


Home (A Good Omens AU, Little Prince style)

by Inovium



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Can be a one shot or have a follow up chapter I’ve yet to decide, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I might edit it again eventually when I have ample time, I still don’t know if describing the death should make this mature but read at your own risk, M/M, Not Beta Read, Not really open ended though, most nights actually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:01:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22068934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inovium/pseuds/Inovium
Summary: Once, some time long ago, an angel was sent down to earth to see how Her creations had fared in Her silence. He could not be blamed if he was a little bit curious about the universe, it was his first time out and about, after all.He travelled at his pleasure, fluttering short distances from planet to planet. He savoured the way the clothing he wore flowed with the flap of his wings and brushed against his skin. It felt pleasant, which surprised him, as he expected more discomfort adjusting to a perishable form.As he travelled, he met some of Her creations, all so different and curious, and wondered why they were isolated. Despite this, he said nothing. She was wiser than he, after all, and should he not lay his trust in her?So on he kept, learning and travelling and yet never really learning, and so never truly getting any place. And soon, his home, Heaven, was just a small pinprick of light in the distance.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 7
Collections: Good Omens Holiday Swap 2019





	Home (A Good Omens AU, Little Prince style)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Siilverlines](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Siilverlines).



Once, some time long ago, an angel was sent down to earth to see how Her creations had fared in Her silence. He could not be blamed if he was a little bit curious about the universe, it was his first time out and about, after all. 

He travelled at his pleasure, fluttering short distances from planet to planet. He savoured the way the clothing he wore flowed with the flap of his wings and brushed against his skin. It felt pleasant, which surprised him, as he expected more discomfort adjusting to a perishable form.

As he travelled, he met some of Her creations, all so different and curious, and wondered why they were isolated. Despite this, he said nothing. She was wiser than he, after all, and should he not lay his trust in her?

So on he kept, learning and travelling and yet never really learning, and so never truly getting any place. And soon, his home, Heaven, was just a small pinprick of light in the distance.

It was a great test of his strength and will to get to the earth, how utterly exhausting it was even to make short trips from planet to planet. Despite the loveliness of everything he saw and passed, and how glorious the stars were, he was tired from the travel. It was knowing this, that as he looked up at the bright sky, minutes after he descended to the earth, he knew he would not get back to Her. Not in this corporation, at the very least. No matter, it was his soul that was needed for this task. It’s what he was made for. What comes after is a question he feared to ask, though he had a guess it would be the end of the road for his existence.

The first thing he noticed was that there was not a human to be seen all around. The ground was yellow and dry, far too dry for anything to grow on it. Only barren sand everywhere to be seen. This must have been one of those deserts God had created, and how big it was! Unlike Her other creations, he would not be able to step into the morning and night so easily. He quickly went ahead and started walking, hoping he would find the exit of this desert soon.

No sooner had he gotten on the road, did he meet a snake. A great beast with scales darker than the night sky, a belly redder than blood, and yellowed eyes sparkling viciously with mischief and amusement.

Ah, The Snake, after all.

“You, She’s sent you, hasn’t she?” A soft voice inquired, curling his s-es in a pleasant and most definitely practiced to be suave manner. The angel said nothing, staring at him coolly. At this, the snake looked on, undeterred by the slight frown on his forehead and soured curl of his lips. At the very least, he did, until the angel didn’t stop only staring in disapproval, then it just got weird.

“I don’t- I’m not going to hurt you, or- or anything like that. Promise! I’m just curious, She... She hasn’t sent anyone down since, well, since Eden! That’s all!” He may not have been afraid, but the stare was starting to get uncomfortable. His tongue hung slightly out of his mouth while his head turned slightly to the side, emulating what must have been embarrassment in his human body, but just looked cute as a snake.

It may have been this that softened the angel, who felt his apprehension leak out of him. With a slight cough and a look away, he softly responded, “Promises from a demon... must not be the most reliable thing,” He chuckled awkwardly, a little brush of pink dusting his cheeks. This had to be the most awkward interaction he’d had so far, no less, one with a demon! “I’m... oh, how stupid of me! I’m not worried about you! What is it, your vibes? Oh!- You’re confusing, just like those other people on those planets!” The snake stared on with a somehow more blank expression than he had before, his tongue still sticking out of his mouth. He was sure regular snakes weren’t supposed to be like that, but then again, this was no true serpent, after all.

“Well, I must be off. Now, begone, foul fiend!” He waved weakly away from him with his hand. The snake simply followed his motion with his eyes, then turned back to the angel and stared.

When the angel walked, the snake would follow. When he stopped, so would the snake. It looked utterly ridiculous that he was shouting at a snake who, like a puppy, kept on following him.

Finally defeated, the angel turned and crouched to the demon’s level, and impatiently asked, “Alright, it seems I won’t be getting rid of you any time soon, so will you please give me your name?” No sooner had he said this, when the snake started shifting smoothly into a human form, until the angel was left looking up at him from where he crouched. The demon was wearing what looked to be a sleeveless shirt and jogging pants, which would have seemed slightly fitting for the hot weather if it weren’t for the dark colours. The angel couldn’t comment on it, though, he was fitted in a cream sweater and trousers and told to go on his way and, ‘make mummy proud, wouldn’t he?’

“It’s Crowley, and what about you? Won’t you give me yours?” An amused voice cut through the angel’s wandering thoughts and floated down to his ears, smoother and more man-like than before, and admittedly more pleasant to listen to... but what was he thinking?

“Aziraphale, though the others thought it was a mouthful.” Crowley tilted his head to the side and put a finger to his cheek, eyebrows raised as though in thought. He then crouched down to the level Aziraphale was still himself crouching at, and held out his hand. At this, Aziraphale stared and raised an eyebrow, and looked at the demon with a questioning gaze.

“Hand shake, like this.” Crowley reached forward and took Aziraphale’s hand, giving it a few firm shakes. The angel looked down at their intertwined hands, a slightly surprised look on his face, and held the demon’s hand tighter.

“That feels rather nice. Oh! Ah, sorry!” Aziraphale stuttered out, letting go of Crowley’s hand like a hotcake once he saw that the demon’s face had taken on a light dusting of pink, and was trying to maintain a neutral expression. Crowley reached his hand out to rub his neck, and blew some breath out of his mouth.

“No, it’s- it’s nothing. Let’s, ah, move on to more serious topics. What are you supposed to be doing down here?” As Crowley inquired, Aziraphale stood up and dusted imaginary lint off, before continuing to walk. His companion, of course, followed.

“Well, the Almighty has sent me down here to look into the state of humanity, and the earth. A report, of sorts, and in some time I’ll be leaving the earth once more. You don’t need to worry about me, I won’t be very long at all. See if they’re still kicking it, and then, ‘fwoosh’!” Aziraphale motioned an arc with his hand, accompanied by some appropriate jazz hands, and looked up at the sky, “Out of your hair in a jiffy, you wouldn’t even know I was here at all!”

“But that doesn’t make sense! She’s the almighty, she doesn’t need to send someone down to do a status report on earth! And even then, Heaven’s got some agents already on here! Just a quick notice, and update, and they’d be on it and back to her faster than it probably took you just getting here! It doesn’t make any much sense, why She’d need you down here bumbling about on everything when she has experienced field agents!” Crowley motioned wildly around, voice getting higher as the confused agitation increased. Aziraphale looked uncomfortably off to the side, his foot making a small dent in the sand while he wondered of the acceptability of asking questions, all the more on the almighty’s decisions. Telling this demon was simply out of the question, it was too personal, and who knows what would happen if he did say? 

It’s unfortunate that he couldn’t seem to truthfully justify the later reason with the explanation in his head. He didn’t actually think the demon meant him any harm, so why wouldn’t he just tell him?

“Well, I don’t know, but she must have a good reason or purpose! It’s simply beyond our comprehension, it’s- it’s ineffable!” Aziraphale finished off his statement with a sharp turn of his head, raising his nose up and frowning in indignation. It looked prim and prissy enough to garner a chuckle from the demon, and the following curiosity at his reaction simply served to turn the chuckle into full on laughter.

“‘S nothing, Aziraphale. You just reminded me of some of her agents down here. Like Gabriel, or- Oh! Oh, like Michael, a wanker if I ever met one.” Crowley rolled the words off his tongue and stuck his tongue out at the angel, grinning cheekily all throughout. He didn’t miss the small smiles and stifled giggles of his acquaintance. 

“I’m not quite sure what ‘wanker’ means, though it definitely sounds rather funny, I’ll give you that. But regardless of the use of this whole reporting business, I am enjoying myself, and all of this! It’s all very pretty, and pleasant- and- and new! I do love Heaven, and I love Her, but the change of setting is quite exciting, and all the colours and things I’ve never seen, dare I say, it’s some of the best things I’ve laid my eyes on in my life!” Aziraphale gushed out his excitement at every word, hopping and swooping about, eyes shining in beautiful wonder and amazement while his arms and hands flitted about, gesturing to everything around and beyond them. By the end of his small speech, he sighed and relaxed back into a steady, comfortable pace, but the light in his eyes never left, and a small grin set into his lips.

He noticed his companion looking at him with some wonder in his own eyes, wide and amazed, and his mouth parted slightly into a faint, open mouthed ghost of a smile. The angel quirked his head to the side, thinking back to all he’d said. Was there anything off with how he spoke?

Crowley broke the short silence, saying, “Sorry, ah, for that moment. I just don’t see a whole lot of passion and amazement these days,” as he apologised, a pair of eyes wide with shock turned to him, “Do you mean to say they don’t see all this beauty around them? Then I’d have to bring that up with Her...” his gaze turned down to the road in thoughtful revery. Crowley shook himself out of his daze and walked slightly ahead of Aziraphale to explain.

“No, I mean, well, sometimes people do enjoy it all, of course. Look up to the sky and admire the stars, lovely stuff. I just meant that your level of passion and care, I just haven’t seen it in a long time.” After this, some silence hung around them while they both kept on walking, while Aziraphale sorted his thoughts, and Crowley sorted his mind and heart. It was Aziraphale who broke the ice once more.

“I’m not very familiar with all this, you know, everything around me. You, however, have been down here for years, probably thousands of them by now! I don’t think you’re out to kill me, and I’d certainly get little done for a good while alone, so could you possibly act as a companion of sorts?” The angel muttered out, hands fiddling with one another while he looked down, shy to be asking this of his technical enemy. Crowley grinned and lightly bumped him on the shoulder, prompting the angel to look up at him.

“You know what, yeah, sounds good to me. Down there’s been rather quiet lately, might not need me for a good while yet.” At Crowley’s words, Aziraphale grinned and seemed to vibrate with energy and joy. In those moments, both beings felt a sense of calm and safety about the rest of the angel’s stay on earth.

So on they travelled, learning and walking. Aziraphale drank up knowledge like water, and Crowley told him stories and memories that always had the angel on the edge of his seat. It was a sight unlike any other to watch Aziraphale discover books.

“-I’m afraid I don’t quite know how to read, however,” the angel sadly muttered as he put the book back in Crowley’s hands. Crowley pushed the novel back into his palms and flipped it to the first page, determined to keep the sorrow from reaching Aziraphale’s heart.

“I’ll teach you, then. It’s easy as pie! Here, let’s begin...” and so, the demon and angel spent a night under a tree in the country side, reading by moonlight, with an accompaniment of cricket chirps and the whistling wind. If the breeze that flew past was cooler, and the stars in the sky shone brighter, as though with more glee than usual, neither of them noticed.

Days turned into weeks, which quickly sped into months, and flew away into a year, then more, and like a sapling, so nurtured with sweet company were these years that the two who shared them inexplicably grew to care for one another. And so an angel and a demon fell deep down into love’s warm, waiting arms.

Of these years, some moments were worth slowing down to watch unfold, like a bird unfurling it’s wings, or a butterfly breaking out of it’s cocoon. Not all these moments were quite so thrilling with happiness, though.

On one fine morning, the duo were strolling through a market place, looking around to try some local cuisine and delicacies. The angel had discovered food not long ago, and was so delighted by the sensations brought unto his tastebuds that he gladly indulged in a fair bit of tasting and sampling wherever they went. His appetite, however, had been drained as soon as he was met with the image of the local boys beating and whipping a dog with glee, pushed on by the canine’s whimpers.

“What are you doing? Stop that! Leave it alone!” Aziraphale rushed forward, shooing the boys away from the animal. The children, still laughing at their actions, fled the scene, throwing taunts and mockery at him as they ran. Crowley ran to the angel, leaving an apple seller in the cold from where he had been looking at their fruits.

“They were beating this dog for- for what seemed to be their concept of entertainment, not giving a thought to it’s pain and misery! Why would they do that? What’s so amusing about hurting others?” Aziraphale wailed to Crowley. At some point in his confusion and upset, he had kneeled beside the dog, checking it for damage. The locals had started to look weirdly at the foreign duo, wondering about one’s outbreak and seeming surprise at the occurrence.

More eyes popped open as they saw the dog’s torn flesh and broken bones put together and sewn back into place, all on it's own, as though going back in time and repairing the dog to it’s original state. 

Once the dog was in good form once more, it stood up to swarm Aziraphale in licks and jumps of joy. Crowley looked around with worry at the slowly gathering crowd and dragged Aziraphale off to a side alley, ignoring the angel’s protests.

“What were you doing?! Performing a miracle in public like that? Do you have any idea how- how stupid that was? If people got wind of this and told some researchers, or occultists, who knows what some of them would do?! What those humans would do to you?!” He shouted at Aziraphale, who was growing more and more frustrated with him, tears pooling in his eyes while his forehead crumpled into a frown.

“And what would you have me do? Watch that dog die at the hands of some village misfits? Or bleed to death in my arms? While I did nothing? None of the grown ups were doing anything to stop those children! No one even bat an eyelash at their cruelty!” The tears pooling at his eyes had spilled over into fat drops down his cheeks, while his knees buckled under his weight, and he leaned against the alley wall, hands against his eyes while he sobbed into his palms. Crowley’s anger dissipated, and he kneeled down to level with the weeping angel. 

“Angel, I’m... I'm sorry about my outburst,” He said as he pulled Aziraphale’s hands to his sides, and brought up his own hands to rub away the angel’s tears. Bright blue eyes looked back at his own, glossed over with fresh tears and frowning in confusion. He brought the angel closer to his chest, and rubbed circles into the ringlets of his hair while he whispered some words of comfort to go with every hot breath forced against his heart. 

"It's in their nature to be capable of good and evil, it's the privilege to choose whether they lean more to good or bad. A lot of them are good, and they make this world amazing to be in, but a lot are also bad, and don't see or care about the sadness they make so long as they're happy, and you can't let them get to you, angel. Sometimes they're really good at looking good, and they're the most dangerous ones. I can't let them know about this, our- your existence, specially, they'd do monstrous things just to satiate the curiosity in them. I'm just, scared to lose you, that's all. I'm sorry, Aziraphale." He noticed his own voice has gone lighter, and that he'd instinctively taken more care to level his throat and voice. Damn it all to Hell, he wasn't supposed to cry! He was a demon, evil and wiles and all that stuff! Yet the very thought of his angel being subjected to all the torture some rotten apples in the barrel are more than glad to deliver chilled him to his damned soul. It was dangerous to get attached to anything at all because of Hell, imagine one of the best, holiest angels he'd ever had the pleasure of meeting, but it was too late to stop himself, now all he could do was coil tighter around this being he so cherished.

So they eventually got back on the road, to a crowd of people careful to move out of their way and avoid eye contact. If a child ran up to them and pushed an apple into Crowley's hand while mumbling a soft thank you for doing what they were so scared to do, no one needs to know. No one needs to know that the demon may have pat the child on the head, and encouraged them for the kindness in their heart. No one needs to know that the angel knelt down to the child and blessed them. No one needs to know that an angel and demon told a child to nourish the good in their soul, and carried on their way.

The years kept on flying, until five had passed, and the duo had nearly finished encircling the earth. In this time, as they were traversing a small woods, Aziraphale stopped from admiring the beauty of the plants upon the realisation that he had learned to love not only the world, but all of the life and beauty on it. He’d grown fond of the beings on it, and was startled to realise he considered it his home. Not his home away from Heaven, mind you, rather his actual, honest to goodness home sweet home. It was a terrifying thought.

“Aziraphale, what’s wrong?” Crowley asked, worry tinged into his voice as a gentle hand lay on Aziraphale’s shoulder. The angel jolted back into reality, and sheepishly looked away, trying on a mask of embarrassment and dazedness. Unfortunately for him, his travelling companion of years had learned to see his lies and truths.

“Angel, what’s the matter? Anything worrying you?” The demon was now face to face with the angel, hands in a gentle squeeze on Aziraphale’s arms. The anxiousness was visible in his entire stance now, and so the angel sighed and figured the truth could be no worse a thing to tell in this time.

“I’m almost done collecting all the information I’ll need for my report, which means I’ll have to go back to... to Heaven, and Her.” And suddenly, the air around them was drenched with sorrow, and the slap of reality was so harsh they could almost hear it, almost feel the sting of it’s steel palm cutting into their cheeks. Crowley looked vulnerable and guarded at the same time, eyes trying so hard to hide the sadness behind them.

“...Right, yeah. Back home and- and singing in a choir feeling unparalleled peace. I miss it too sometimes, you know? I get it if you miss it Up There, must feel awfully homesick after all this time.” Crowley tried to fill the thick atmosphere up with banter, but the general air of happiness had clearly been snapped into pieces, and the joy he had felt minutes ago had flown with the wind. 

“That’s- I-... No. If I were to be honest, down here on earth is the happiest I believe I’ve ever been. It’s home to me now, and I love it here...” Aziraphale’s voice trailed off while he looked to the distance. And suddenly, he could feel the hope rising in Crowley, in the eyes growing wide once again, but how could he watch this? Knowing he’d have to break Crowley harder than his prior announcement just had. He didn’t think he could stand it, not for as long as his heart beat at the sight of him.

He loved him, he’s not sure how long he'd known, or when, but he knows his heart’s been Crowley’s for a fair time now, and he knows that Crowley loves him, too. He could feel invisible flowers slowly bloom around him, and heard the beating of a heart that cried his name out in all it’s pains and aches.

So how could he ever do this?

And yet, the prospect of leaving him optimistic, to hope for something that may never, and in fact, could never be was far worse in his mind. And so, that left him the heart crushing truth.

It’s possible these thoughts ran through his head so quickly that he had finished thinking all this before Crowley had even begun speaking.

“Then you can ask her, right? If she could send you back down? You could tell her how much more good you could spread down here, and the greatness in potential of everything you saw! You-!” Crowley’s dialogue was cut short by fingers being pressed upon his lips, and the grim shaking of an angel's head. Aziraphale was looking at the demon with such gentleness and love that he could feel his heartbeat racing, and the hairs on the nape of his neck stand. He also felt the sorrow in the fingertips that traced his lips, leaving ghostly trails and brushes down his neck and collarbones, and finished off as heavy, convulsing slides down his arm, meeting and intertwining with his fingers and hands. Crowley watched, his face pale and lips quivering, while Aziraphale raised a sad smile up to the sky, and silently cried.

“I- I don’t- Aziraphale, what’s going on? What’s wrong?” Crowley asked, his voice weak and desperate, and very afraid. He pulled his hands from Aziraphale’s clutches and brought them up to rest on his shoulders, putting some weight on it since his legs felt weak. He felt like he was going to be crushed into himself, until he was so small no one could see him anymore. 

"Crowley, I can't come back." These words came as a whisper from the angel's lips, shaking with the will not to cry out. Crowley frowned in confusion, head shaking slightly from side to side while his lips curled down.

"What do you mean? I mean, it'll be hard, but She- you said this was what you were supposed to do, they'd see the point of sending you back!” Crowley exclaimed. Aziraphale shook his head, looking down to his feet. He couldn’t look Crowley in the eyes, or he’d definitely break down into a nonstop wave of sobs. No, he needed to get this out without falling apart, otherwise he’d never be able to let it out at all.

“I can’t come back down, Crowley. There’s a reason I was sent down in the first place, why it was me instead of the other agents down here. This is what I was made for, to see and experience humanity, and God will take my soul to understand it to the depth that I have. I’m- Crowley, I’m down here because she wants to understand humanity to a level that would kill an angel!” He couldn’t resist the sobs from leaving him now, not when he could feel Crowley’s hands shaking where they were holding on to him, so tightly he could feel pain in his shoulders. He could hear desperate gasps of breath from the demon, who’s knees seemed to just barely keep from buckling. Finally, he looked up.

Aziraphale would far rather have taken back all the years they spent and have never met the snake at all, than see the look of utter pain and devastation on his face, and know he did this. They danced along the edge of a cliff, and yet never realised they fell. Not until they’d hit the cold hard floor beneath, and left both of them broken. 

Crowley said nothing, he didn’t need to. For once, he was so plain and clear to see. There were no barriers, big or little, into the depths of his heart. Everything about him, every part of him, only spoke of anguish, of a pain so great it was as if he’d been shot through the heart. The demon’s knees finally buckled underneath him, his entire being shaking like he had been submerged into a barrel of ice water and left to dry in the antarctic. Aziraphale lowered himself to his knees, holding Crowley in his arms as he started to go red in the face, breath quickening with every passing moment.

“No,” Anthony’s voice pierced quietly through the air, watery and yet full of fury just aching to be released. “They won’t- She won’t take you away from me, angel, I won’t let Her!” He screamed it out, up at the sky, hoping God could hear him, smite him if She will.

“Crowley, you can’t pro-“ “I can and I will!” The situation was similar to their first feud in the public, though who was the worried demon and who was the upset angel this time, one couldn’t clearly say. The demon felt burning hot tears escaping, and the pity filled blue eyes on him were helping none. He could feel the grief charge faster at his heart, screaming to be let out, and left to tear him into shreds and strips of what he once was. And when he could no longer hold it back, he howled it out, cursed at the skies, and the seas, and all life in existence, that he’d never see any single one of them ever again without feeling a heart shattering pain, a reminder of who would never be there to see them with him again. 

“How the Hell could you, you up there, make an angel destined to die? Where the fuck is the justice? How could you doom one of your angels to die for the most stupid fucking reason in existence?!” Crowley’s voice, cracked and dry, choked out to the stars that had now risen above them. Aziraphale pulled him to his chest and held him as close as he could, biting down on his lips while a few tears left his own eyes, no matter how tight he shut it. He could do nothing but whisper his apologies, over and over in a million ways, to the demon who had given up the fury to just sob and wail into his sweater, holding him as close as his exhausted arms could. 

If the stars that had now risen above them glowed the dimmest, most sorrowful they ever had, and the breeze blew weakly and whistled like a cry, neither of them noticed.

They got back on the road, eventually. Though how long "eventually" actually was, not even they knew. They went on with their lives, rarely referencing anything in relation to the situation, and never at all addressing it. They kept on with their travels, sometimes noticing a sad smile, or a mind buried deep within itself in sorrow. It was something to hide until they thought the other wasn't looking, and so it wasn't brought up.

Time was running out, though, and they were soon back the way to the exact place Aziraphale landed some years ago. 

"Crowley, I've been wondering something. I always meant to ask you, but, well, it did seem rather strange at the time." They ignored the wording, the insinuation and background of it. They needed to forget for as long as they could or, God help them, they would lose all sense of composure they wore. 

"What is it, angel?" Came after a few munches and gulp of an apple. Crowley found there to be some irony in him enjoying ‘the fruit of knowledge’, or at least what the humans thought was the fruit of knowledge. He threw the core aside, not minding the slight disapproval on Aziraphale’s face.

“Well, that. You always call me either Aziraphale or angel, so it doesn’t seem like you find saying my name to be a mouthful. I’m curious, why do you do that?” At his words, some red creeped up Crowley’s neck, and the flustered demon brought a hand to rub up at his nape.

“I- well, it’s, uh, a- a nickname- a pet name, I guess.” Crowley muttered. Golden eyes locked unto the ground like it was particularly interesting, and the blush bloomed into a full cherry red up his cheeks.

“Ah,” The angel’s voice trailed off, his foot shifting in the sand beneath. Crowley looked up to see Aziraphale’s cheeks dusted with a bright pink, and a small, nervous smile on his face. His eyes, sparkling under the sun’s rays, were wide with some surprise, and his golden hair reflected a small halo under the sun’s light. Suffice to say, he looked like a portrait found in a museum, the kind of art revered by many. He was adorable, and absolutely breath taking, so much that in Crowley’s admiration, he nearly missed Aziraphale’s words. Nearly.

“I’m honoured, my dearest. Oh, goodness, that was nice, but I’ll need some more time to get used to calling you that. Still makes me flush redder than a tomato just to think of it!” He looked off to the side, smiling and giggling while his eyes softened to a look that could only described as love, with all it’s half-lidded longing behind it.

“Angel...” Crowley stared on, wide eyed, and felt the smile slowly creeping up his face. He felt Aziraphale's fingers brush his own, and followed the slight curl of the fingertips around his own, in a gentle and soft cares.

“Come now, my dear. On we must,” said a soft yet insistent voice, with the hand that tugged gently at his own. So they kept on walking to an undeniable end, until a thought crossed Aziraphale’s mind, not very far from where he’d... chosen.

“Crowley, I... How will I-“ Aziraphale’s voice faltered, and his eyes fell downcast at the reality they now had no choice but to face. Crowley could feel his hands shaking once more, but brought them up to the cheeks of his angel, to rub soothing circles below his eyes.

“We’ll figure it out, angel. Don’t... Don’t worry about it. I’ll handle that,” And how could he have taken it back? When he saw a small well of relief fill in the pools of Aziraphale’s eyes, he would ask you to tell him, how could he not bring it upon himself to let his darling’s worries be his own?

Perhaps, you could reason, he simply should have said nothing, but he would scowl at you, and you would find yourself having a particularly memorable day for simply how horrid it would be. 

On their final night, while they rested on a rock (and while they both resolutely ignored the final location so nearby, and their lack of need to sleep), Aziraphale found himself in that almost sitting position on Crowley, where his lap lay across Crowley’s own and he had his arms wrapped around his demon’s neck. Crowley softly ran his fingers through the hair of the angel snuggled on to his shoulder, and heard him humming a tune he knew he never heard and yet sounded so familiar. For just a moment, they both forgot what was ahead, an irreversible destiny that awaited one of them, and, perhaps, misery in every crack and crevice of the other.

Slowly, Crowley felt his angel’s breath slow and soften to a quiet snore, and lay a hand over his chest to feel the light beats of his heart. He looked down at this being clutching him close, even in his sleep, and could feel his breathing shake as he realised just how vulnerable his love was, and that despite all his wishes to protect him, he wasn’t absolutely sure he could.

No, what a vile falsehood. He knew he never could and will, not against God Herself.

Here, then, did the shaky breaths dance a waltz with his tears, a heavy sigh and a drop down his eyes. He gently let his forehead fall unto Aziraphale’s, and wrapped his arms tight around the torso of his angel.

“Please, God, if you still listen, if you ever did hear me, don’t make this happen. Take him far away from me, if you must, but don’t... don’t kill him. Not like this, how could it- how could this be the way he has to...” He couldn’t keep it up any longer, the words died at his lips as they ran wild around his mind and heart. The wind that whistled around them, and the sand that blew with it, was the coolest and roughest against their skins. Crowley could not but hold his angel closer to himself, trying to shield him from the sand, and hope the night never ended.

Day broke sooner than he had anticipated, lost in his memories. He could feel a cold chill down his spine, and every bone in his body told him to run, run as far as he could and never let the pain catch him and kill him.

He stayed despite it all, resisting the restless ache of his legs to leave. He watched Aziraphale wake up, brows frowning at the sun’s rays and the heat of the desert returning. Silently, he let Aziraphale get up from his hold, and took the hand outstretched to finish this journey. 

What had he planned, then? It was cruel, to every party involved, but so far in the desert, he could think of no other options that would spare his angel the pain.

He may be in his human form, but his teeth were still sharp, and he could still bring from it a venom so potent it could render anyone dead within a minute, he’d tested and discorporated one or two unfortunate demons in his boredom (and laughed all the way down to Hell to face his beatings), and also had an internal resistance (also tested with some disappointment and wonder), which reduced some risks of it going wrong. He was still nervous, somehow, seeing as it was a hastily put together plan. 

It went like this. He brought the angel’s wrist up to his mouth, and held it fast against the cry of pain, and the subconscious pull away from him. And it killed him, to feel the venom leave his system, and the fatigue in his angel’s eyes weighing down on his body like lead. Within seconds, Aziraphale collapsed to the sand, and the blood he choked out of his mouth was a solid, deep, dark, and red chunk, like death. 

A demon cried out to his angel, clasped in his arms, who left a bloodied kiss on his cheek. A howl resonated through the earth, that day, one that sounded of an anguished cry for his love, his love, oh, how could he do this?

And when this demon looked back down to his arms, he had merely a split second of a ghastly smile, and a shaky huff around a mouth forming the words he swore were ‘love you’, before the angel was gone. The blood he had choked out crumbled away into nothing, and even the heat, so reassuring and reminiscent of heaven, was gone from his ice cold skin.

And the demon? She may have thought it best to put their shared memories away for safe keeping, lest his mind truly destroy it.

Which is to say, he forgot, and would forget, until further notice from Hers truly.

How good an ending for a fairytale... but this is no fantasy, and this, a case on which I do not kid. This is a matter of great importance, and so, worry not. Rest your pretty head and wake up tomorrow, knowing this is not the end.

My child, my lovely stardust.


End file.
